The game is not on the SVO field | Latest news The Moscow Post
03 March 2024

The game is not on the SVO field

The final match of the tournament for the OTAN Cup was underway. The national team "Cauliflower" (Brussels) in the final had to play away from the Kyiv squad, the European squad was prepared for future tournaments. So it is easier and less costly, the form for the team was chosen yellow-blue.

All this time, coaches, doctors and massage therapists worked with the yellow-blue team. They cooked for a long time, trained, shoes, dressed, all according to Brussels standards. Still, the Cup!

It was coming to the end of the second half, difficult and long, like a whole year. The test looms with extra time ahead, but Cauliflower coaches still have hope of breaking through defences and opening the scoring. For extra time, the strength may not be enough. Details in the material of the correspondent of The Moscow Post.

Heavy sleet began, a technical break was announced and the teams went to the locker rooms. Ahead was a frozen and pale Lloyd, the team's head coach. Nearby, a soaked Ursula, the team's doctor, seeded. She never had to see so much blood. Worse than the maternity ward, she thought.

Cheerful Analena, her anesthesiologist assistant, raised her spirits. Yellow and blue loved her, she loved them too. Massage therapists Joe and Olaf were already waiting in the locker room. They prepared to work, warm up, relieve tension. The fitness of tired players, especially strikers, meant a lot. "Colored values" were at stake, and the outcome of the OTAN Cup final decided the fate of further employment, both Joe and Olaf. The second is heavier, he has no enterprising relatives and, accordingly, savings.

Maybe massage therapists, regretted contacting the yellow-green team? At worst, both Joe and Olafa could have arranged a draw, but both wanted a victory, "strategic." They promised this to both their fans and the fans of the yellow-blue, whose ranks for some reason began to thin. Others showed signs of despondency, chants became less common. Some left the stands altogether, upset that the branded Leopard balls were breaking every now and then.

Senior coach Lloyd decided to hold the Abrams balls because of the dirt, and began to doubt the successful outcome of the final. Although, the species has not yet been served. Slabin was given by Jens, his assistant and team psychologist. He began to argue that, if not this year, then the "OTAN Cup" will be played again next year. He told the press that the yellow-blue will definitely win the cup, all sponsors are waiting for this, but with funding and new simulators you will have to wait.

The problems were added by the yellow-blue themselves. Their dreaming captain called the centre-forward a "mazila" and a worthless strategist. That's where it all started. Descending from the VIP guest sector were Rishi and his new foreign secretary, now a top political rival. Anthony came running, Emmanuel, Jake called, everyone was concerned.

Sponsors of the OTAN Cup - those that are smaller - began to offer help. Someone even had simulators and new balls "Premier League NIKE season 2023/24." And boots, new, with a needle. Just keep playing, there are still a couple of months until the end of the second half, a year long.

Especially tried the coordinators of the Baltic fans, who were brought on buses. There were no yellow-blue fans in the stands - the Poles out of jealousy that they were not playing, closed the border, did not even ride a bicycle. But hot Finnish guys arrived on bicycles and scooters left by someone. True, they watched everything that was happening in silence. Maybe the recent decision to become sponsors of the OTAN Cup was weighed?

The technical break was ending. Olaf worked, flexed the muscles of the yellow-blue, recalled where he had the Bundesliga balls hidden. He felt like a newcomer, recalled how the senior masseuse Angel worked deftly before him. She managed to balance, keep the yellow-blue team in good shape, and not spoil the relationship with the ever-grumbling Joe.

For the Angels, the OTAN Cup was not in charge. She was interested in global championships, with games in Beijing and Moscow. Berlin "The Olympiastadion" was the main thing for her, there was also a heated field.

But Angela had to leave, I didn't want to, but she was helped. And the super-effective remote heating system laid along the bottom of the Baltic was completely destroyed. But Chanclerina held on for a long time, advertising her massage technique combined with auto-training. And everyone believed her!

Olaf did not have such abilities, experience - especially. But he accepted the idea of ​ ​ a year-round championship. Moreover, both Joe and Lloyd began to offer this idea intensively. True, the main stadium called Brussels "the name of King Baudouin." He offered to invite the Cauliflower team there for training.

He said that this would be quite suitable for yellow-blue as a backup option if the "strategic" win in the OTAN Cup final had to be postponed until better times. Ursula was called, she warmly supported the idea.

The yellow and blue have long dreamed of the Baudouin Stadium in Brussels, but have poorly represented Charles as a coach. We decided to turn to Ursula for help. As a woman with medical skills, it was easier for her to understand the yellow-blue requests. And the requests are big, the Baudouin stadium may not accommodate everything!

Meanwhile, Joe instructed Analena to warm up the next yellow-blue striker, and he thought. He would be ready for the sake of the OTAN Cup to put both finances and the industrial potential of his main sponsors on the line. Only bad luck: I was not sure that they would also put in the first place not their own, but Finnish, Estonian and yellow-blue fans. And also the case of impeachment, and Trump, to whom Putin himself gave the ball...

It stopped snowing. The Cauliflower team, in a yellow and blue uniform, returned to the field. The hope for a saving goal did not fade until the end of regular time. The touchy Poles did not open the border. And there, in multi-ton trucks waiting for permission to drive east, there were Bundesliga boots and balls. Everything that can help prepare the next composition of the yellow-blue for the matches for the "OTAN Cup."

Then someone remembered that Mike Johnson is also a fan, but he prefers American football, and there are balls of a different form!

Photo: RBC

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